Nature Found a Way

Nature found a way and that bitch stole you away. Against the odds you gave me something that I can't part with.  Against the odds I found something that forces me to walk away from you.

I think you could have loved me someday. I know I'll love you for all days here, there and gone.

But that's where you'll stay

Gone

Here is where I rebuild

A week of hell... A week of happiness? A week of my heart being torn out. A week of feeling my heart fill with love? I faced hell on Heaven's cloud. I feel guilty for that. And grateful.....

Now I rebuild myself. Please let it not be a lonely incomplete construction site.

Surgery soon

I'm very nervous that I'm making the wrong decision about going under the knife. Correcting another decision I made. Will this fix me? Will iit open up the possibilities of a different future? Time is of the essence but still I am very very scared and anxious. December I change or rather I go back to who I once was.


Is that really a good thing?

Waiting for no one

Waiting for I love yous, meant to be and forevers. A hand that reaches for mine, a sudden unexpected embrace. Instead of happily ever aftwr, i just sit here and wait...

Waiting for No one. I didn't miss him, he'll just never come. Wasn't meant to be complete and yes sometimes I laugh at the irony.

Tempted twice now, thought I found him out but still it was a dream.....

And people wonder why I hate sleep.

Goodbye to the late and great...

There times we had no one but each other. Forced friendship of common sorrows that linked our lives. Imprinted in our minds are shared memories both good and bad. Despite the harsh days, I know I'll forever miss my friend.

You told me things that can't be true. Talked for hours about the world just to feel heard. Your loneliness could never be cured. You suffered, but you gave up so long ago. Self appointed victim. But on days when the hell let you go you loved your son, and we were friend like so long ago.

I hate you for this sadness you gave me. I hate what you did to your son. I hate you for blaming me and I hate you for being gone.

My heart is fractured because I made you worse. I exist as toxic as a person can be.

Years of friendship, you OD'd on me.

Disappearing man

You said you wouldnt disappear but how could that have been true? I guess it's my fault for loving you. You can't control your mind how can you command your heart? I'll never have that love returned to me and it breaks my soul apart. I finally saw you and I've been worrying day after day and you looked at me with disdain and told me to go away.

I wash my hands but they won't come clean. Is this paint or the blood of friends that dared to trust me? I wish there was something about me that chased your demons away. I wish you could feel the hurt radiate off me and want to hold me in a loving embrace.

Doomed to this lonely existence but I guess that's just as well. I wish for his happiness before my own maybe he'll find it during his disappearing spell.

the pleasure she's feeling can't erase her self loathing

there are not enough words to describe a single thought of you

when you were inside me and looking at me with sweat dripping down your face with such
an amazing gaze I felt an insane orgasmic eruption! Some pain some panic but all pleasure. I don't know if everyone gets to feel that good in their life but I at least want you to feel that good.

I died a little