Surgery soon

I'm very nervous that I'm making the wrong decision about going under the knife. Correcting another decision I made. Will this fix me? Will iit open up the possibilities of a different future? Time is of the essence but still I am very very scared and anxious. December I change or rather I go back to who I once was.


Is that really a good thing?

Waiting for no one

Waiting for I love yous, meant to be and forevers. A hand that reaches for mine, a sudden unexpected embrace. Instead of happily ever aftwr, i just sit here and wait...

Waiting for No one. I didn't miss him, he'll just never come. Wasn't meant to be complete and yes sometimes I laugh at the irony.

Tempted twice now, thought I found him out but still it was a dream.....

And people wonder why I hate sleep.

Goodbye to the late and great...

There times we had no one but each other. Forced friendship of common sorrows that linked our lives. Imprinted in our minds are shared memories both good and bad. Despite the harsh days, I know I'll forever miss my friend.

You told me things that can't be true. Talked for hours about the world just to feel heard. Your loneliness could never be cured. You suffered, but you gave up so long ago. Self appointed victim. But on days when the hell let you go you loved your son, and we were friend like so long ago.

I hate you for this sadness you gave me. I hate what you did to your son. I hate you for blaming me and I hate you for being gone.

My heart is fractured because I made you worse. I exist as toxic as a person can be.

Years of friendship, you OD'd on me.

Disappearing man

You said you wouldnt disappear but how could that have been true? I guess it's my fault for loving you. You can't control your mind how can you command your heart? I'll never have that love returned to me and it breaks my soul apart. I finally saw you and I've been worrying day after day and you looked at me with disdain and told me to go away.

I wash my hands but they won't come clean. Is this paint or the blood of friends that dared to trust me? I wish there was something about me that chased your demons away. I wish you could feel the hurt radiate off me and want to hold me in a loving embrace.

Doomed to this lonely existence but I guess that's just as well. I wish for his happiness before my own maybe he'll find it during his disappearing spell.

the pleasure she's feeling can't erase her self loathing

there are not enough words to describe a single thought of you

when you were inside me and looking at me with sweat dripping down your face with such
an amazing gaze I felt an insane orgasmic eruption! Some pain some panic but all pleasure. I don't know if everyone gets to feel that good in their life but I at least want you to feel that good.

I died a little

Sensations they take you, rock you and shake you
the urge to submerge just about breaks you

with his presence the sense go wild
I flow like a river heated up like the Nile
Pulse is frantic with quicken breaths
tongue feels heavy wanting just to lick

body is stirring, clitoris is purring
breast are aching and thighs are quaking
Longing for his body so ready for the taking

run teeth on his skin as an animal kiss
look to his eyes seeing if he likes it
trace his muscles, outline his flesh
grab at his cock with a lust filled grip

shake it, jerk it then taste it
it fills up your mouth
that drives your pussy aching

the blood rushes his pulse echos
the high point comes and you just want to let go

crazy, madness, you forget day and time
it's him and he's yours
and you pretend that he say's "your mine"

Not wanting to stop
to dose the flame
you position yourself on top
and you mind screams his name

Can he feel the madness?
Has he gone crazy with you?

Outside of time you possess each  other
For what would seem like forever
in this frenzy of elation
maddening sensation
unrestrained titillation

You just can't help but to thank him.